Cake

CAKE founder, Melinda Gallagher, offers her take on whether NY women can have a public space to explore their sexuality without becoming...eek oh no...men!

Melinda Gallagher, self-proclaimed feminist and president, co-founded CAKE back in 2000 after graduating from NYU with a degree in human sexuality and finding that there was no forum to explore specifically female sexuality in the real world. “CAKE is an entertainment company that promotes female sexual empowerment,” says Gallagher. But she is quick to add, “We specifically don’t promote or produce sex parties. We would rather explore some fun theme and allow the actual sex to happen in the privacy of people’s bedrooms.” She continues, “Women are more comfortable keeping that stuff in the bedroom but exploring the nuances of it out in public,” which implies recognition of some distinction between men and women when it comes to sexual openness."

Unfortunately the story of finding NY's "Renaissance Woman" stopped there and quickly digressed into a tortured discussion on the much maligned, played out storyline - "Are women becoming the new men?" This in the context of a renaissance. Ugh!...When is this ever going to end? Are women ever going to be recognized for our very own, very specific, very valid sexual culture that we can call our own?

We have said it once, and we will say it again - To pose the question "Is the modern woman becoming a man or a man’s fantasy?" completely misses the point of real women's real lives. Female sexuality is not a black and white issue and we are just beginning to explore all of the wonderful nuances of women's sexual lives - what women want, what turns us on, what gives us pleasure, what do we want to see, hear, touch, explore and so on. Sexuality has historically been defined from the male perspective and much about sexuality is still thought of as inherently and exclusively male. Until we get over comparing women’s sexuality to men’s, our right to be sexual beings will fail to be recognized and validated.

Ah, you gotta love the Press's need to jump on the female sexuality is black or white bandwagon that has been going on since feminism began. This simplistic (and frankly meaningless) story has been one too many times before.

NY Press: FINDING NEW YORK'S RENAISSANCE WOMAN by Kari Milchman