Cake

Have you had both monogamous and nonmongamous relationships? What are your views on monogamy and/or open relationships.

Name: Alethea
Sexual orientation (if any): hot & bothered

Yes & Yes I am VERY wishy washy on the whole issue. There are times when I am guilty about my thoughts and feelings for my lover and I wish I could be a "good girl" [especially since we go to church and my husband has become more God-focused] I just feel like a "sinner" ~ but I feel so good, so happy, so alive when I fantasize and play with my other man! It makes my sex life better with my husband, makes me more sexually empowered, I feel great and guilty all at the same time! I'm a mess, I know!!

Name: Eskay
Sexual orientation (if any): bisexual

I was previously married for 19 years. We had an open marriage for the latter years of the relationship. The marriage did fall to pieces and certainly my ex-husband blames our swinging lifestyle for that. I'm not convinced. I think the break up was caused by a multitude of reasons. I am now in a monogamous relationship with a very conservative man who I love dearly. The sex, whilst not frequent enough for my liking, is always deeply satisfying and enjoyable. BUT THERE IS NO WAY I'd ever contemplate turning this into a non-monogamous relationship. Even if I do miss my sexual encounters with other women. (I don't miss fucking other men.) Because to open up our relationship would mean my having to let him fuck other women. And I don't think I could handle that. Besides, I really don't want to share my body, my sexual self, with any other person other than my current partner. That's how satisfied he makes me feel. This doesn't mean I don't enjoy fantasies about fucking other people from time to time when I masturbate. It's an interesting question, because I do think I would enjoy fucking other women from time to time, or maybe as a regular part of my life. But it wouldn't be fair to ask my partner to abstain from fucking other women just because I'm the bisexual one. It's also interesting for me because my partner may have a 'secret sexual self' that he does not share.

Name: Ana
Sexual orientation (if any): straight

I have been in a relationship for 10 years and we were both nonmongamous sometimes. I just feel that i want to be with him forever and that is ridiculous to think both of us are never going to feel desire for other person. Now i have been monogamous for about 4 years and it feels great too. I just think you have to do always what feels right for you. But i like to think it better to talk openly about it. I think i can tolerate if he has sex with other girl, and he too, but if he gets involved it will be painful for me. I am open to a relationship where sex with other people is tolerated, and talked, and no big deal. But it doesnt mean is always easy.

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